Monday, April 27, 2015

Of little people.

So it was true.
Every 99% accurate test in the world said it and to add to it, the doctor confirmed and smirked that most 99% accurate tests could be believed 99% of the times. Heh, dark humor, a voice in my head acknowledged it.
Preparations began almost immediately. Calling parental units, bookmarking, subscribing to newsletters, going overboard with the organic shiz(nah I didn't do that). This whole phase can get very confusing if you don't stay alert, by the way. Like people would ask you how far along you are in terms of months, your doctor in terms of weeks and trimesters(which have often come out as semesters from my mouth no kidding), so mentally you are like this is 17th week, a month has 4 weeks mostly, so 4 months over for sure and you get the drift. So at times you feel like KEEP CALM AND TRUST BABYCENTER. This whole pregnancy "wonderland" is a phase in itself. Everyone around is extremely considerate and concerned about you, which turns 360'degrees in exactly a year's time but let's take this one by one. This phase also gets very interesting in the sense that all science and sense known to mankind comes to a standstill, and people make extremely certain judgments about gender of baby based on your rotundity and complexion, and of course, THEIR experience. And there are the labor tales. Looking at you being pregnant suddenly reminds everyone of their delivery table and *that* narration comes out in the most gruesome and melodramatic way.
So anyway. Laddoo(and that's how we are going to address her on social media) was an easy baby, so I knew zilch about morning sickness, diabetes and everything else pregnant ladies complain of. Infact, I cooked meals for the two of us till the week before I delivered. Life looked good and I thought I could keep this baby inside forever if allowed.
And the whole thing got over just like that and out she came. It wasn't easy. And I wouldn't be exaggerating if I said it has been the most difficult thing I have had to do till now. And truth be told, no one said it would be easy, but you don't realize it till you see it yourself. I have not even a faint memory of how she looked seconds later, thanks to fatigue and being drugged. So all those mommy posts I had read saying it was the most beautiful moment and how they wept tears of joy at this miracle called birth - that TRP winning episode was not at all aired on my cable channel. I felt like an angry customer who wanted his money back.
All I wanted was sleep. And food. For God's sake YOU FED ME ICE CHIPS WHICH WERE QUITE DELICIOUS THANK YOU BUT I NOW WANT REAL FOOD. But they brought me a hungry baby instead. After every hour. And it looked somewhat like this -
[1am. Scene at hospital few hours after Laddoo is born.]
Nurse: Ooh the baby is crying. I think she needs you. She is hungry maybe?
Me: But I just fed her 15 minutes back. For 15 minutes. Which means I practically just put her back right now.
Nurse: Oh she must have pooped then. Yes, she has!
Me: But she drinks like 4 drops. Like DROPS.
1.45 am.
Nurse: Ooh the baby is crying. I think she needs you. She is hungry maybe?
Me: *looking at baby* Girl, we need to talk.
So the thing about Babycenter is that these guys send updates quite methodically every week saying this week your baby is the size of a grape, peapod, watermelon and all. But not one email about "what to expect immediately after delivery", "10 ways to make sure your husband suffers along with you", or "how to make your mom let you eat what you want to eat and not just garlic". DUDE BABYCENTER. WHEN WERE YOU PLANNING TO TELL ME. And so, for the next fortnight or so, I pretty much pulled all-nighters. And then got used to it.
Today, she is all of 15 months old and controls me like my parents couldn't have in all these years. When she sleeps, I feel like I don't know what to do with my time now. She amazes me with the way she thinks at this age despite the 3 decade gap between us. And she does make life worth every hour of labor that existed ever. For you, a thousand times over, S!


  1. Naaaa did not like it.......just loved it!!!!!! Bagwati, u write really well!!!

  2. You alwz amz meee wd ur wrtng !! .. lve ya... its awesme !!.. OK Kanmani !!!.. I wrte tis way coz I just saw "bout youuuu ":. You lke dis kind of coding lang ;).. so here it is...

  3. I appreciate your blog post, beautifully expressed and well written.


Liked it? Or liked it not? You told me once, but I forgot ! Your two cents mean a lot. :-)
Thanks for taking time to comment.