Thursday, November 6, 2008

7. Title ka kya achaar daloge?

No really. I don't know if this makes me some kind of a handicapped person but I dont seem to write on some particular topic. I mean, people tell me this blog lacks direction and contains inexpressive and depressing content that would make Mithun Chakraborty look like a philosopher. Ok,that should be something. Presenting to you all the wickedness and trash in the world in a bulletted format. Here, goes!
  • One of my pals is planning to buy a bike. After 3 long turbulent years, this sounds like some nice thing coming up. And then there are always people who would suggest buying a car. Err.. My advice would be that unless you have 3 boisterous kids and a wife, who wants you to take her to the big shopping sale(annual), buying a car is like going to an Ashram with Hansika Motwani (Hansika who? You are lucky to not have known yet). Aah, riding on a rain-washed road must be nothing less than bliss.
  • Is MTV selling these days? Whats with Splitsvilla(Oh, dont ask) and the Roadies thingy? We've had a 1.0, and a 2.0, and a 3.0, and a 4.0, a 5.0 and now guess what? Roadies 6.0 auditions alive and kicking right up there!(Sign-up now and u'll get a Cheat Code DVD free). What with Splitsvilla ending up(That was some relief). Indian girls. A whole bunchload of gaalis. Bitching. Elimination. And more bitching. And a whole lotta fame and money for yourselves. Indian women-elegant? Hardly. Oh, and I cant stand the sight of pretty angelic Cyrus Sahukar on the screen. Rannvijay was the reason I was watching Splitsvilla anyway.
  • Which is noisier? A) A jet plane playing Reshammiya(was that 2 M's? Umm. Even Altaf Raja would serve the purpose) screeching right behind your ears? Or is it B) 3 Sardaar kids in a train playing antaksharee on the seat behind yours? Wait there's more. Their mother emptying dabba after dabba of what might look to be the raashan for the entire month. No dinner for me tonight. Seeing them eat was dinner enough. And for the answer, its usually the descriptive and extra-long-than-needed statement which forms the answer in an MCQ(Deduced this way back in college). And so its B. I trust my intuition and keep quiet in such cases.
  • The above was the highest point of the day for a zombie(thats me) who was waiting since eternity for this tremendously anticipated trip to Chennai. I think I am more nostalgic about Delhi's food than anything else it gave me. Ever. Go to the Paranthe-Wali gali at Chandni Chowk and show me a parantha without butter, and I ll show you a deer that watches FTV. And its hardly butter. You might even wonder where the parantha is(Ok, that was sad)
  • Talking of accent, I think Shoaib Akhtar would put HBO and Star Movies to shame. Is he from some place called YouAssAye?? Jaanne ke liye dekhte rahiye Sonee Ennertaynmen Chaanayl.
  • Steal my laptop if you would please. Hell no, I am serious. My dad wont sell mine and if he doesn't, there are meagre chances I would get a new one and I need a replacement. I can just leave that stupid thing outside the back door, say tonight? Its all dark in the house by 10 itself. Hop in by the garden hedge and pick it up. I ll leave the charger and accessories included.
  • So, now the job is here. Man, this is going a little too fast. I might need Pond's Anti Ageing Miracle Cream before the next World Cup. Looks like paying myself for those cute but expensive earrings, those indecent parlour bills, and making kids do math homework from 6-8 pm is closer than it should have been. Rewind a little maybe?
  • I miss my Scooty more than anything else right now. Weird how these little things give you a sense of independence. Road rage isn't exactly how it used to be 4 yrs back. But red lights are an empty phase of my life. Useless staring is all one can do. Those myriads of gawdy yellow colour(dirty) signs that say "Road kee Rani/Buri nazar wale tera muh kala/Horn Please OK". You,like many others, can also look into others' cars/vehicles and watch whatever they do. Which is what I do. Oh and then there are lots of those helmetless "Ameer baap ki bigdi hui aulaad" who keep on accelerating their fiery red bikes that speak "Speed Demon" or some "No Fear" sign. Find a Punjabi Daljeet Singh constable and know you know where this guy is. The light is green and we need 40% oil to refuel the tank.
p.s. Sometimes it takes a disoriented occipital lobe(Thats in ur head) and a whole lot of wisdom to come up with something like this. Only insanity comes naturally to me.
p.p.s This is just to add some flavour to the otherwise boring post.
p.p.p.s The above p.p.s was really not necessary.


  1. I wish to state that the blog still lacks direction.
    Let me carry forward the tradition of the bullets.
    - I just hope your pal does not end up with a wife whose size equals the grand total of a normal fair, good looking, tall wife and three boisterous kids put together.
    - Dont watch MTV if you dont like it. There are a lot better channels around. I share your opinion about indian girls though. Hey...are you one? :)

  2. @ram
    Welcome to the world of directionless thoughts. U may choose not to visit :)
    Continuing with the tradition :
    -Will surely tell him :)
    -It was a simple opinion by an enraged 'Indian' girl who never missed an episode of the earlier Roadies versions :)Bad memories with Indian girls,eh? :)


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